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Category: guest blog post

After The Laughter: A Survivors Journey From Hurting To Healing The Scars Of Domestic Violence

You finally met the love of your life. It was as if the heavens opened up and poured out the perfect cocktail of good looks, intelligence, adventure, confidence and charm. The love was fast, the passion was fierce and the communication was intense. You were intoxicated by his affection, attention and adoration. There's no place on earth you would have rather been than tucked away inside his loving arms. There was late night laughter and early morning kisses as you were whisked away to... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Monday, July 27, 2020

Using Creativity as a Tool for Transformation with Survivors

Ten years ago, I discovered a collection of poems titled ‘Holocaust’ by Charles Reznikoff’s. During this time, I was working as a consultant in London in the arena of gender-based violence. Reznikoff’s work resonated with me. I had grown up with stories of the war in my family. Also working with survivors of abuse, I had a deep awareness of the impact of trauma in the ‘ordinary’ settings of family and intimate... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Monday, July 13, 2020

What Everyone Ought To Know About Domestic Violence

Having worked with victims of domestic violence for over fifteen years of my career as a registered nurse I thought I knew what I needed to know about abusive partners. I had gone through my professional training, I had worked as an emergency room case manager in addition to working in some of the best and cutting edge Level I trauma centers in the United States. I was smart, skilled and resourceful. I thought I knew what I needed to know to spot an abuser; However, nothing could have ever... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Monday, June 1, 2020

The Revictimization Game

At the age of 82, I thought I was long past feeling the poison cocktail of emotions: shame, anxiety, fear, grief, anger and nothing that accompanied being a victim of domestic abuse. Then I read of the social media garbage thrown at high-profile women whose partners have humiliated, stalked, beaten, shot …. I’ll let you fill in the rest. If you’re reading this, you can probably extend the list for three or four more lines. Now I feel all those feelings, but mostly anger... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Thursday, January 30, 2020

Believe It or Not, Coloring is Therapeutic!

When I felt no one could understand what I was going through, and I felt alone during the difficult times in my life, coloring helped me to cope and to heal. I've experienced childhood sexual abuse and domestic violence. I've had to have surgery to repair my brokenness. I endured the loss of my father to suicide, job loss, and experienced sexual harassment on the job. I did not enjoy any of this, nor did I ask for any of these things to happen to me.  My experiences span the... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Monday, August 19, 2019

Officer Involved Domestic Violence: A Survivor Story

It’s a topic that is discussed very little. It’s a topic that the public has little knowledge of. It’s a topic that is not given enough attention: Officer Involved Domestic Violence (OIDV). Estimates vary, yet it’s estimated between 20-40% * of law enforcement families/significant others experience domestic violence. The International Association of Chiefs of Police have developed a model policy. Departments are encouraged to adopt policy, but it is not a... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Monday, June 24, 2019

I Don't Know About You ... But Lately I'm Feeling Violated

Lately I am feeling violated with the online headlines that announce that the latest celebrity or politician has sexually abused someone.  When I can't sleep, memories of sexual abuse and torture I suffered as a young wife more than 30 years ago creep into my consciousness alive and well, playing themselves out as if it was yesterday.  I learned that the name for this is “Complex post-traumatic stress disorder (C-PTSD)* which happens as the result of enduring complex trauma... Read More
at Thursday, January 18, 2018

The Power of Speaking Up

I had always heard that abuse is life changing. Whether you are in it for 1 year or 20 years, it can change your perspective dramatically. For an outsider, it may be difficult to understand how one part of your life could change the way you see the entire world. I was with my abuser for slightly less than one year, but yes, this one year changed everything. And what other people do not always realize is that things are not just magically resolved as soon as the relationship ends. Dealing... Read More
Posted by Lynn Brewer-Muse at Thursday, December 14, 2017

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